I'm Back

I doubt that my absence has been noticed by many people, but here I am just the same. Winter has arrived in Topeka, although we still get pockets of "unseasonably warm" days. For example, it's 5:58 a.m. on Dec. 12, and the temp is a balmy 41. It's supposed to be like this for the rest of the week, so I'm going to take advantage of the warmth and finish winterizing my yard. Gotta get those faucets covered and hoses rolled up!

California, here I come! I get on a plane ten days from today and run away to California, to spend the holidays with Boo and Scott. I'm really looking forward to this. My way of beating this first holiday season without SeeSaw. We're planning on a couple of days in Monterey, sleeping late, river walks, shopping, wine, lazy times. It's going to be great. I get to see my nephews again! Haven't seen either one of them for ages and ages, so I'm really excited about that. Gonna finally have time to learn to download my digital camera, too, so watch our Flickr!

Family is a fantastic thing. I love how God designed human beings to need more than one for procreation, which is one of the things that provides us with family. Friends can be amazing and wonderful support systems, but there's nothing like family. Most of us are blessed with families who love us unconditionally, who may shake their heads in disbelief at some of our actions, but who still support us and care for us.

The semester is officially over; this is finals week. I have two web pages to finish this week, then I'm done! I'm doing a page for Steven Hind, an amazing Kansas poet. His poetry just sings to me. And paints wonderful mind pictures. I've become really interested in the link between the arts. Poetry, when it's good, paints a picture in the mind. Art, when it's good, is like visual poetry. Music is both. I've started a drawing class on Saturday mornings. I want to learn more about the "how" of art, the mechanics of drawing, in the hopes it will help me select the right words for my poems, to select the perfect words to paint the picture I want. I don't see me ever being much of an artist, but it's fun learning. One of my artist friends is giving me additional pointers and instruction. He says "I think you're one of us." Maybe. All I know for sure is I love art, and seem to be in a sort of "abstract appreciation" period. The walls in my home are alive with color and motion, and I love it.

Gotta go get ready for work. have a wonderful best day of your life!

Crunch, crunch

It's autumn. This may very well be my favorite time of the year. I've moved into a neighborhood with an absolute plethora of different types of trees. Driving down the street your car enters a tunnel of red, orange, golden brown and brown leaves. The lawns are carpeted in autumn colors which I, personally, find much more inviting than the plain green of summer grass. I know I need to collect the leaves in my yard (to keep from freaking out the neighbors, if for no other reason), but I keep putting it off. I love the look and sound of fallen leaves. Shrubs are giving up their leaves as well, revealing marvelous sculptures of bare branches. Soon these sculptures will be bold against pale winter skies, against snow, covered in ice. I love how that looks.

It's a Dark and Stormy Night

There's thunder, lightning, and rain happening outside. I'm curled up in bed with my laptop, enjoying the storm. Do thunderstorms make you lonely? Or sad? Or are they just exciting to you? I used to love them, and still do in some ways - the noise, the flashes of light, the power. But at the same time they make me feel very small and alone. I miss having someone to cuddle up with during storms, someone to sit and talk with by candlelight, someone to drink a glass of wine and laugh with.

It's been a really long month, and lots has been going on. My webpage on Steven Hind is nearly finished. I'm going to tell him I want to continue our correspondence, though. He's such a cool person, aside from writing poetry that sings to me. He wants me to send him some of my poetry now. Gulp. My stuff is so clumsy, so banal, next to his. I'll do it, but with trepidation. Actually, I've been working on one I titled "If I Were God," that's much more rhythmic than what I usually do, and actually rhymes. And I'm stuck on it. A friend who also writes poetry was over for dinner tonight, and gave me some suggestions that were helpful, but I still feel pretty stuck. Maybe Steven will have some suggestions. I ordinarily write poetry as the muse strikes, all at once, and do very little revision. This one is being much more difficult. Or I'm getting pickier or something.

I had a hammertoe repaired two weeks ago. I have 3 more weeks to hobble around with a steel rod sticking out of the end of my toe. One of the students at Washburn looked at my foot, and said "Whoa. That is the coolest piercing ever." What in the world was he on?

I've finally sold my old home - closing is next week. I will be so glad to be done with it. We lived there very happily for 21 years, so it's kind of sad that it's become such a burden now, but that's really what it is. The memories of fun times there will always be good, but memories are seldom really enough. Oh well.

I'm going to shut down and get some sleep (I hope). May your evening be peaceful.

Nicely Filled Weekend

This has been a busy weekend. Fun, though. I spent Friday evening with a friend, doing absolutely nothing but lounging around watching sci fi on TV, and had a great time. Saturday I puttered around the house, my youngest son and gang came up from Wichita to spend time with his girls, and I went to a Trivia night at a local church. It was a terrific evening. Then today, we had a family reunion with SeeSaw's family, at the lake. There were fewer there this year, but it was a really fun time. His mom's family is terrific. They all love to tell stories, they laugh a lot, they enjoy each other. Nice.

Tomorrow starts week 1 of my annual 50+ hour weeks at work. It's catalog time. I have to split the University catalog up (electronically) and disburse it to the different departments for updating. Once I get their copy back I move into the 60-70 hour weeks. Yawn.

We're too darned busy in this country. Cultures that are truly civilized spend hours over meals, talking, laughing, fellowshipping. Fast food could only have been invented in America. Other cultures recognize the importance of leisure time, and don't feel like it has to be filled with "worthwhile" activities all the time. Sometimes it's OK to just take a long, leisurely walk and enjoy the view. I don't know. I guess I'm just feeling restless tonight.

My life has always been pretty pedestrian, and pretty well planned out. I like what Mer said the other day on her sight about trying to be more spontaneous. I think I need to do that too. Although, compared to a lot of my friends, I am pretty spontaneous! :-) It's just that since SeeSaw fell asleep I've felt sort of at loose ends, like I didn't really know where I was going. You know why? I don't know where I'm going! But I think that's basically OK. I have a few long-term goals, and a couple of short-term ones, and I think my answer is to just relax and enjoy the path.

I still have boxes to unpack, but I've decided that's OK. The stuff I really need is out and available, and the other stuff can just wait for cruddy weather. I like to be outside when it's so nice, so that's what I'm going to do--sit on my patio, putter around my plants, go for long walks or drives in the Flint Hills.....just whatever. Winter's on the way, and I'll be stuck inside more then, so I can use that time to unpack and sort stuff.

Starting to yawn here, so I guess I'll shut up and zonk out. Have terrific Mondays all of you!

Who Has More Fun Than I Do?

Last Monday my handyman/friend, the amazing Jason, taught me how to use and control a jackhammer. Do you have any idea how much fun that was? We were removing chunks of concrete from my existing tiny patio to have places for new concrete and deck posts. It was so fun to wield that heavy, massive, masculine tool and make it do what I wanted! The acorns adorning the patio were absolutely dancing, I was laughing, Jason was laughing. It was the most fun! I felt strong, and young, and powerful. Until he took it away from me and sent me inside to fix dinner. Oh well.

We've re-ordered lumber for the deck, and it should be in Wednesday. Woo hoo! Providing they didn't send crap this time, the real work on the deck should begin Wednesday or Thursday. I can't wait. I've been wanting a deck instead of a patio for years, and now I'm getting one! It'll be great. We're even putting a separate area off of one corner for the grill and a small table for "grill stuff". Soon I'll have a good home for my chimnea (sp?) and can use it again, now that the evenings are cooling off. Heaven!

I signed a contract on my old house this morning. Finally! There are 1400 (well, 1399) houses for sale in Topeka right now-definitely a buyers' market! Once I brought the fellowship in on the selling difficulties it sold immediately. I love believers. Now, believe with me for the inspections to go well.

One of our chemistry profs has set up a CSI Night for the dorm hall I mentor. We did this last year, and the students loved it. They get to do comparison stuff and solve a mystery, which Prof. Salem and her lab director have dreamed up. The students get a taste of chemistry, she gets to plug her forensic chem class, and everybody has a good time. I'm looking forward to it.

Gotta get back to work. Have a wonderful, beautiful, fall day. Enjoy the moment.

Just Stuff

I worked our Kansas State Fair last week. I always love working there, meeting people from around the state, talking with students and parents who are considering attending Washburn... It's fun to see the exhibits, and I must admit I like visiting the jewelry vendors. I should be embarrassed about that, but I'm not.

It was wonderful to get home on Saturday night after being on the road. For the first time I realized how "home" my new home actually is. When I walked in it was just, like, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." You know?

I went to the last day of our local library book sale Sunday afternoon, and remembered why I never, ever, ever, ever! go the last day. What a madhouse. Books are $2.00 for a paper grocery bag full, so people just scoop them into bags without looking. I did manage to find a book about Robert Frost, which I look forward to reading, and Flo Menninger's memoirs, but basically it was a wasted trip. And I could have been napping! Ah, well, sometimes I just have to fall back into something to remember why I've been avoiding it. :-)

Discovered yet another side of a new friend that I never dreamed existed. He writes poetry! Darned good poetry at that. Man, a painter/handyman who's also an artist and a poet. No wonder he does such good work.

My correspondence with Kansas poet Steven Hind continues. What a wonderfully generous man he is. So giving in terms of sharing how he works, his thoughts about poetry in general, etc. This is turning into seriously fun and interesting research. I'll post a link to the web page when it's finished.

How many of you write poetry? Do you share it with others, or is it too personal? Let me know!

I Love Poetry

Do you just adore good poetry? Last night I attended a telnet seminar, "Kansas Poets Shop Talk. The featured poet last night was Steven Hind, who has been nominated to be Kansas Poet Laureate next year. I thoroughly love his work. He writes about Kansas and Kansans, through his own experiences, and somehow the poems are global in their impact. My "Mapping Kansas Literature" class this semester includes researching a Kansas author and creating a web page about them and their work, which will be linked to the Center for Kansas Studies website. Steven Hind is my project. My instructor contacted him about my desire to research him, and he responded with a 'poem in progress' and permission for me to contact him directly. I love this.

Here's one of the poems he read last night:

Fall Day

Wind brings its old news blowing
through this house in a crack in the hills
where two fields lie still under their loose
bare skins. In their rooms the table and bed
have been alone a long time, hunched in the dark
like old men trying to get up. Once, twice, again
at night wind taps a door against its jamb. Nobody's
home to stop the question. Wind keeps asking hinges
about letting go. Mouse and black widow return.
Wind reaches out and pulls a brick loose. The rest
of the chimney stays clenched in its old mortar
against the sky. Take your time, says wind.
--from "In A Place With No Map", Woodley Press

Isn't that fantastic? One of the things I love so much about Kansas is the wind. Wind is always with us here. It shapes our landscape, bends our trees to its will, cools our skin or bakes us dry. I love the wind.

Here's another of my favorites. The simplicity of it intrigues me, as well as the immediate movement from strong beginning to strong finish.

O'Keeffe

"No one ever asks me
why I make the river
so small," she says,
lavishing the canvas
flower with color.
That empowerment,
her device of sight,
made a trophy of
Vision. Take up
the right weapon
and set the cross-
hairs on your world.
--from "The Loose Change of Wonder," Woodley Press

Check out kansaspoetry.org for more terrific Kansas poets. Enjoy!